Header pic of 18th hole at STOCKS golf Club

STOCKS sWindle - Haven't heard much recently - why don't YOU send me an update?

sWindle Gallery - for amusement only!

Have used the one's I had but there are some key players missing - do you have one of them?

Click any Heading Line (with the blue minus sign) to show hidden text ----

And CLICK THEM AGAIN TO HIDE THE TEXT! (Pressing F5 will re-start the Gallery)

Charity Week Park Venues

You should all (sWindlers who have sent me their email address) have received the messages from BobD and JohnT as to this Wednesday's meet being at Stockwood Park and next Saturday (21st June) will be at Aylesbury Park

Change from Cow Roast?

I have checked with Bob Burton the catering/ Bar Manager at Ivinghoe Golf Club and he would be happy to accomodate us! There is apparently adequate parking and if we ring through at :09:30ish our orders can be freshly prepared for approximate times after 13:30. 3 simple example dishes are (you guessed it) Ham, Egg & Chips @ £5.50; Steak Baguette, Chips & Salad @ £6 and Ploughmans @ £4.50. I am told the food and beer are fine! ) What do YOU think?

Current Status

Last 6 sWindles (up to 15th August) now below with just simple results - sadly wasn't present and have not yet compiled the playing history stats as have only just received the results for sW 123 (which only have estimated scoring.
It would be useful to get some feedback as to your interest in the sWindle stats page (last sWindle results always in the Right Hand Box of the 4 when you first see the page (before clicking anything!))stats page - If you manage to click the right bits each sWindle can be seen in order of points and each player can see his playing record in a choice of sWindle, Money or Points order... please feedback if you don't get it to work for you and if you have any interest - in short IF you don't want it I won't waste my time and I can't guage usage.

sWindle 125 - 11th August

1: Charlie B 2: Chris M 3: Diggers 4: Andrew B. 11 Played.

sWindle 124 - 4th August

1: Diggers 2: Ian Dobbs 3: Bob D. 12 Played.

sWindle 124 - 28th July

1: Ian davies 2: Del 3: JC 4: Simon P 5: Wrighty. 22 Played.

sWindle 123 - 21st July

1: Euge 33 2: Richard Howells 3: Ken 31 4: Mark T: 30. 20 Played.
Rest scored as 25 as did not get actual scores (the winners are guestimates)

sWindle 122 - 14th July

1: Mack 2: Bob D 3: Beardy. 11 Played.

sWindle 121 - 7th July

1: Martin Crisp 2: Coops 3: Tom 4: Mark T. 16 Played.

sWindle 120 - 30th June

Up to speed on this one - 16:22 Saturday and here are the results!: Bit drizzilly at the start but counted 14 in the huddle. Sadly Del didn't feel up to it, and apparently Simon Philips had a runny nose, then Alec and Graham could only manage 9 and that left 10! Chrs and Ian had other things on so eight of us did the roasted cow and duly decided that Al owed George his sWfiver (for second place and Graham could be held liable for a fiver towards SLavers 1st place! (I scraped a humble third and am owed nout). Details on sWindle stats page (last sWindle results always in the Right Hand Box of the 4 when you first see the page (before clicking anything!))

Hot from the Pigeon - sWindle Results of 16th and 23rd June (118 & 119)

Of 17 on the 16th Will was first with 33pts, Charlie next with 30 beating Bob J (on countback) and then Mack with 29.
On the 23rd again 17 and Bob D Beat JT (on countaback) with 33 points with Bob J (again in the frame) in 3rd, Hindy 4th and Ian Davies in 5th. It looks like Chris M was in 6th but only won some pigeon droppings (not legible). George should be playing this next Saturday - fresh off a daily practice and a recent round of 76!

AWay sWindles on June 2nd and 10th

As the course at STOCKS is closed for the charity days the sWindle will be playing away - at Aylesbury Park on the 3rd (see Chris Medley) and Berkhamsted on the 10th (thanks to Chris Beard but tell me as he's away).

sWindle 117 - 26th May 2007

The magic 17 again (I wrote this results afetr the above 2!) and Malcolm Howells shot 38, Hindy 36, Mack 24 and Dan with a mere 32 points (off plus 3) came in 4th. Slash was only a point behind but didn't win a penny.

sWindle 116 - 19th May 2007

FA Cup Day so a few early 3 balls... also 1st three places have uncollected money! Eugene reminded us his handicap was a bit generous at 2 and earned £30 in 1st place whilst Malcolm Howells was 2 points behind in second and Beardy ambled in just behind (on count-back) ahead of Mack in fourth place.

sWindle 115 - 12th May 2007

Bob James was a clear winner shooting 2 over the course and Alec came (3 points behind with 35) a masterful second with Mark scoring a 31, one of his lower scores but still gaining £20 and a cut back down to minus 1. John T expressed some glee to come in 4th, gain £15 and enjoy a cut down to 13.

Six Monthly Handicap Revision

On March 16th 2007 each sWindler's handicap was raised by .1 for each time he had played since the last general (fidelity) revision. Bob Dixon and Del thus deserved their 2.2 and 2.1 upgrades!

sWearlies

It would appear generally a popular option to allow for the odd occasion when a sWindler wants/needs to get away early - so now its offishal!? On that once or twice a year special occasion arrive at 09:10 ish, make up a 3 ball and leave names and fivers. It would not fair on the following 3 balls if four balls were to lead the way - even if they religiously let faster groups through that procedure is also time consuming.

sWindle 102 - 17th February 2007

Second of the year and 25 played in good weather amazingly including the return of all 18 of Wrighty's Crusaders. Ken Whitton came in with an 'arm flinging' 34 points which puts him back down to scratch, Steve Green (nearly) stood humbly aside but eventually claimed a deserved 2nd place (also 34) and Slasher continues to claim trophies in 3rd. A slight problem with the change of shift in cashiers ended up with Simon P. (4th Place) gaining a credit entry for a future sWindle! You can see the last 2 sWindle results in full here. I will be away for a few weeks from end of March (during which time am I will visit George) but will be publishing more stats and stuff after that (in a new selective format blah blah).

sWindle 101 - 3rd February 2007 (FIRST OF THE YEAR!)

High scores again. JC peaking for Turkey - shooting 1 under to win from Malcolm on 37 and Del on 36 with 5 on 33. Apparently there were 24 of you but only received 23 scores - so if yours is missing tell me. See the full sWindle results here. Have been asked to pass on good wishes and thanks (for all the fun) from Ernest who (sadly) has left us. Borghesi is also perhaps worth a few moments reflection / commiseration - having established himself in their New Delhi quarters (of some acres!) - the poor chap has had to concern himself with the choice of servants, which pool table to furnish one of many spare rooms with and how many balls to hit preparing for his Golf Lessons that cost him £50 for many per month! He sends his regards. (He still has the same email address.)

sWindle 89 - 27th January 2007 (LAST OF THE YEAR!)

And he's done it - having played in 39 sWindles since Jan 16 2006 The WoodBine is our biggest money winner - having paid out £195 and won £190! See detailed List of 2006 money winners by clicking here.
'Fraid I didn't make it again but JT sent the results in and they tell me that there were 26 and some high scores (Perhaps the cuts aren't big enough?) - Young Ryan came in first with 39 points (off hc of 1) but his £35 earns him a 3 shot cut, Andrew Barratt shot 37 off 8 and Roger Charge 37 off 9 (all (I believe) well under their club handicaps!) see the full sWindle results here

sWindle 88 - 20th January 2007 (LAST OF THE YEAR - NEXT WEEK!)

GETTING HOT ON THE TOP! 23 of you played with Peter L 1st, Simon P 2nd and Chris B 3rd, Mark T 4th (now off plus 3!), Del 5th and Roger 6th. All making for some interesting stats - It was Del's 38th. game since mid Jan 06 and he's won absolutely nothing! (however he's also lost absolutely nothing) - LEADING the Year's MONEY WINNINGS with £190. Chris B has crept into second place with £185 (but now off 3) and JT 's down to third with £180. Last Chance Next Week! See detailed List of YTD money winners by clicking here and the full sWindle results here

sWindle 87 - 13th January 2007

Strong gathering of 26, 6 prizes but no change at the top! The last group out included 1st and 2nd placed Bob J and Alec with Simon P in 3rd click here for the detailed results. Biggest money winner though was the Hospice of St Francis which received £351 (in fond memory of Claire Lavers) from Simon's £153 he paid (at a £1 for each of our pars scored) and matching donations from all of us.

sWindle 86 - 6th January 2007

13 brave and wet were wonderously beaten by a 35 pointer from the Charge, Malcolm Howells came in 2nd, Mark Trustram was still in the frame after his cut, Chris Beard continues to move up the leder board and JC gained his fiver back. Click here for the detailed results

sWindle 85 - 30th December.

Only Diggers and Slash made a move in the top money winners (still only £25 between 1st and 10th!). James Brown won the sWindle with 35 points and now plays off 12.7, Tony D came 2nd. earning his new scratch handicap, Andrew Barratt played for the second time this year and calmly collected £20 with Ian Kibble (owed) £15 in 4th. Click here for the detailed results

sWindle 84 - 23rd. December.

Sadly George's last sWindle for a couple of years as he's off to India on the 3rd Jan (and christmassing in Italy!). He'll be missed. Mark Trustram mastered the course with a superb 1 under gross with Graham in second, Chris B in 3rd and Alec enjoying the yellow tees in 4th. Click here for the detailed results

sWindle 83 - 16th December.

Didn't make this one - another healthy(?) turnout (24). Promptly received the results from JT though but note that total payout had equal £20's for 3rd and 4th - where's that on the procedures - and more importantly I had to add some ruddy code to the sWindle database to handle the figures! Click here for a look at the Congratsworthy (Stanley, Steve Green, Tony D and ID) and the rest. Particularly sad to have missed GB's response to our Fairwell Card. I did though have the pleasure of a playing with the Right Hon. Micky Ellis on the Sunday - his first round at STOCKS for some 6 years. He hopes to have the chance to win some Guest Vouchers soon!

Geo-Cultural Tour Date (Nemo mortalium omnibus horis sapit)

Wednesday 13th December heralded a special celebration - A Goodbye to George from all who made it! (somewhere around 16 (fuzzy recollection)). Prof. Coops did us proud even demonstrating an ability to race a London Bus. Rest is censored! (or more truthfully my recollection is not perfect!)

2006 ORDER of Merit as at 19th December 2006!

Only a couple more to go! But still the 'same old faces' no movement in the top 10 - and its still only £35 separating them. JT is still ahead of Del (2nd place), Charlie Biswell did (almost) keep his average up (but last sWindle saw him near the bottom along with George and JT). Still chance for (almost) all! especially Tony and Ian D just a couple of quid behind after their last moves. Due to (the indispensable) JT's commitments the likely date for the sWindle annual presentation is now Feb 3. see 2006 Money Table

NEW Annual 'xmas' / Presentation Evening Feb 3rd. NOT A GOER!

Sadly only 14 of you indicated you could make it (although subsequently three of you told me you would have been able..) so - its cancelled - needed nearer 20 to reserve the space and privacy required!

sWindle 82 - 2nd. December.

Great turn out - 27. Good to see Mark back at the crease, JB funkily earnt a tenner which (altho he doesn't perhaps know) I will be giving to Mike T (see sWindle 78 notes). Handicaps still working well (apart from 1) - money winning scores were 2 at 34, 4 at 32 followed by 6 "no cigar 30's". Euge turned in a masterful 2 over gross to get his handicap back to plus 1.5, Hindy missed his put at the 18th to come in second, Beardy's down to 5 and Charlie B was in the frame again to clinch his 5th consecutive win! (£145). See all by clicking here.

sWindle 81 - 25th. November

Some of you got the forecast right - the rest of us got drenched and, for the first time in a long while (eventually) we all squelched in from an early bath. Was amusing to watch Lavers (when we looked back from a phuddle under the gaptree on the 4th.), alone, bent double against the slashing rain, and looking for his ball (some 100 yards off fairway) he was, with (typical) optimism, looking to join up with the next group (his having left)!

sWindle 80 - 4th. November

Best score of the 26 came from George (36 points off 5 and now where he deserves to be : off 3). John T. wasn't far behind with 33 points and no longer a shot on the 10th. Richard Howells not only came in 3rd but also warrants a plaudit for his declared scoring mistake and redistribution of his prize money from last week! (How many others would have done the same?) Roger had a first sight of lucre, Tom got even more (even though we had him off plus two!) and BJ got his fiver back despite losing his match (he had a poor partner). stats below.

sWindle 79 - 28th October

22 happy hackers with Pete Thompson on the top of the heap -managed 34 points off a handicap of 7 (now 5) with the Ratief Lavers (that ever -so-calm swinger) earning more beer money in 2nd (now off 3.5 with £20 outstanding after consecutive 2nd's), Ken Whitton ambled in with 32 points and now off scratch, Richard Howells, Tom Halliday and I all scraped 31 to get on the podium. Del scored 30, didn't get any reward and had another stab at building a partnership with his swing-a-like (Stan BC). See the full stats below.

sWindle 78 - 21st October (follow this if you can!)

Hmmm.. went like clockwork - the orange type: advance play of Sunday (2 day) Medal along with missing scorecards caused 3 & 4 ball 'Swedal' mix but all will (hopefully) work out in the wash (see revised results). James B scored 29 with (B9 of 13) to be originally given 4th place and £10. However that tenner now turns out to be rightfully Mike Tonge's cus I've now been told (by Ken W in email response to me later on Saturday) that he scored a glorious 33 (off 4 and with only 14 on the B9). And so it continues that the other 3 places (1: SL 31, 2: DW 30 and 3: RG 29) I announced are also now moved down one but, as I paid a fiver less (due to having neither the cards nor the sWFivers from KW, MT and SP at the time), their prizes are actually now correct (they no longer are due the £5's from the 3 missing card owners). Simple huh?! I've marked the results with the corrected figures. It turned out that the three waited some time in the Cow Roast and had given up on us (thinking that the traffic diversion may have caused us to re-haunt the VT). And the good news James - you're handicap went up to 15.8 as opposed to being cut to 14.1 (that is if you give Mike the tenner)!

And Del's Back on Top of the sWindle Order of Merit with £175 non-taxable YTD earnings!

sWindle 77 - 7th October

Ryan showed his class with a winning score of 33 (playing off 1 but now joining his Dad off scratch - who apparently "burnt his fingers" playing with bits). Charlie B, scooped a fourth consecutive money grab defeating the system (for the moment) to take his tally to £130 initially off 13.9 but now (with a chance for the rest of us?) off 7.9. JT no longer has a shot on the 2nd. Mr Medley made a score in fourth and the Hux gained a tenner in 5th. Ken was (again) first without reward (other than he's back up to 2). See the full stats below.

sWindle 76 - 30th September

I finally stopped my sad run of handicap increases and won (altho twas a measley £25 cus I can't add up). James Bob bought second, Mack ambled in 3rd., JT allowed himself to be cut 0.1 in fourth, Ernest (typically) gained his fiver back (off scratch) and Ken was 6th with no money.

sWindle 63 gave us a Club Champ, an EGU Gold Medal Winner, a Two in a Rower and a sWindle Winner!

sWindle 63 on 8th July collected a rampant 27 of us most of whom were also competing in the 2006 STOCKS CLUB Championship! Dan Smith labouring with a sWindle handicap of +5 (yes plus five) shot 27 pts in the sWindle but NR'd for the Medal, Graham Prestedge won the sWindle and £35 with 36 points (his friends suggesting that it should be a £40 win to cause a 3 shot cut!). David Slattery doubled his last weeks winnings to £60 for a 2nd. place 36 pointer off 1 (now scratch). Diggers and Bob James didn't do too badly and I even got a sniff BUT Ken Whitton ran way with the spoon and the best SCRATCH SCORE and thus can claim to be STOCKS 2006 Club Champ. AND last but certainly not least, George Borghesi gets the EGU Gold Medal with the Best Nett Medal Score (74). Take a breath!

sWindle 60 had fifteen of us at "Chris's Place" (Aylesbury Park) where Hux, George, Chris and Will all shot 36 points on a very hot day on what started out as a plainish course but ended up unveiling some very pleasing features! sWindles 59, 61 and 62 showed that the STOCKS course is biting with a diminishing average score of 28, 29 and 27! David Slattery (3), John Cooper (3) and Richard Huxtable(9) showed masterful course management though, with winning scores of 39, 38 and 34 respectively. The links below should allow you to see more detail than you need.

The last sWindle in May sourced a story which may have no resemblance to the “truth” or real people! A large bird told me that, as wet as it was and with most of the field already bound for the Cow Roast Fire, a hardy (and possibly foolish) conversation occurred : (to safeguard identities I will just call the conspirators Slash and Hux)
“Hey if we are the only sWindlers to finish we’ll get all the prize money! enthused Slash
“OK then lets get wetter!” murmured Hux obligingly.
But apparently when our bedraggled yet hopeful heroes eventually sloshed up to the rest of the (by then) steamingly smug sWindlers their desperate pleas for recognition went unrewarded!!!

STATS LINKS

I intend to maintain various sWindle stats during 2007 but for the moment not! TI have cleared the old stats (2006) down and will be creating a new format over the next month or so.

What is the sWindle?

Who knows - obviously larger than any one of us but here's my penny's worth! My objective is simply to attempt to provide a fair and pleasurable arena for friendly & competitive golf with a smattering of banter and the odd round of drinks afterwards! A socio-recreational package which we all can buy in to! Originally started by the legendary Micky Elliss, for the last 8 years I have refined a handicap system which spreads the prizes around as evenly as possible - now based only on money won - irrespective of score. Many regular sWindlers thus earn the right to play of several shots less than their so called club handicaps. Most (especially after studying the stats which I make available) accept it as a reasonably fair way to level the playing ground - there have been however some discontented exceptions - a classic example I recollect from 1998 received the this letter from me which still remains as the gist of my response to non believers!

Whilst absolutely not wishing to form a set of inflexible rules I do suggest the following guidelines: everyone should be prepared to play with any other sWindler - the draw will be random; lateness can be tolerated sometimes (only); its a complete package - not a tee booking service - the prize giving afterwards is a part of sWindling; and (last but not least) slow play should be punishable by an equally slow death!

Mick Sends his Best

Have recently spent a bit of time with our sWindle Founder who now seems to favour a glass of red as much as a Michelob!. He sends his greetings and offers a special consideration if you need a roofing job - see Ellis Roofing